Escaped from Egypt, now they were free
Why did they act so ungratefully ?
Through the desert, now all at sea
These Israelites were mannerless

All those years under Pharaoh’s thumb
Slaving away till their hands were all numb
No time to sit and rest their bum
Shifting all them stones

From dusk till dawn, just constant toil
Cruel sun did make their bodies boil
At the whim of such a royal
Cos Pharaoh ruled the roost

Frogs and knats and other crap
God hurled right into Pharaoh’s lap
Sending him into a flap
The gentlest of persuasion !

But now with same sun on their back
They give poor Moses all the flack
They give him pelters – think he’s slack
Unappreciative lot

Whatever life now has in store
It must be better, that’s for sure
Than never been let out the door
In that prison Egypt

They’re by the Red sea, on the beach 
Safe from Pharaoh, out of reach
Band on the Run – that’ll teach….
….the man a great big lesson

But anyhow let’s move along 
And catch up with this massive throng….
….of Israelites  – do we hear a song ….
….perhaps of joy and praise ?

You’re joking – all we get are chants
   ♫  ‘Moses, Moses, you are pants ♫
   ♫   Moses, you are pants’ ♫
Because they have no faith

No faith in God that he’ll complete 
The ‘great escape’ cos they look beat
They’re so tired – dead on their feet
What will happen next ?

At water’s edge each Israelite
For freedom, had an appetite
Across the waves, there was the light….
…. of their home at last

So Moses stood, official, true
Asking God, what next to do
Wandering if there was a loo 
Anywhere on the shore  

But there was mutiny in the ranks
For Moses and God there were no thanks
Just large resentment on the banks.…
….of the anxious Red Sea

Big Ben who was a huge great man
Got angry at the Moses plan 
‘I’ve never was a massive fan
Of that toe-rag Pharaoh

But you have simply made things worse
Rather be back under Pharaoh’s curse
Seems I’m just waiting for a hearse
To take my bones away’

Another bloke got in his face
‘Oi’ he said, you ‘basket case
I’m hungry, need to go someplace….
…. to have some real posh grub

The bestest chip shop in the land 
My uncle Percy runs – it’s grand 
His reputation has always spanned
All across Israel 

Percy’s pies are the best you’ve tried
His fishcakes are the nation’s pride
But I can’t go because we’re tied ….
….to where we all stand here’

A smile at last moved Moses cheeks
The first one they had seen for weeks
Eventually, his voice, it speaks
Continuing the fishy theme

‘I’ve just had a word with God
He’s given me a holy nod
To make sure that you get your cod….
….and chips, with mushy peas’

Make sure that when you order mine
Large chips and sausage will be fine
Like Kings real soon, we all will dine
But no vinegar please

– wind y’know’  

But no, alas, his tones were drowned
People screaming all around 
Frenzied at the sight and sound
Of commotion way behind

Fingers pointed at the hill
Camels, horses, men of evil 
Shame it wasn’t Jack and Jill
Who came a- rolling down

Hateful ones in chariots, so dire
Led by King Pharaoh – his eyes on fire
Having lost his slave empire….….
….had revenge in mind

Man and beast with one sole aim
To control the slaves again 
By spilling blood and causing pain 
Who cares about the plagues ?

The Israelites weep in their tissues
The Egyptians will blow a violent fuse
They sure have anger management issues
Therapy needed there

Holy Moses on water’s edge
Prays to God ‘please keep your pledge
We are standing on the ledge….
….of death, so please help’

The Egyptians are getting very near
With sharpened point on every spear
With loud and poisoned tongues they cheer
So Lord, please do your stuff’

For God it was a piece of cake
A lovely parting He did make
The deadly sea did swiftly break
And behold, there was a path

The Israelites for just a second….
Were dumbstruck, as rescue beckoned 
One thing they simply had not reckoned 
Was their problem solved this way

Moses smiled and down he went….
….to dry sea bed, just as God meant….
….the enemy, to circumvent
The Israelites followed him

Like some Pied Piper, Moses struts  
Urging all to shift their butts 
Before it’s too late, and the sea shuts 
‘Get your ass in gear’

Scurrying, hurrying, worrying inside 
Fearing aqua -genocide
Fish staring on either side
The escapees were all in

However, unfortunately, the Egyptian boys
Followed the sea path, making their noise
Shouting more loudly, full of the joys….
….of revenge and disemboweling 

Unfortunately that is, for them, because….
….before they could sink in their claws
The Israelites screamed their applause
As God closed up the water

As hugs and love at last were shown
Moses got out his mobile phone 
Took some selfies, with Egyptians thrown….
….about the sea, in the background

Everyone waved and danced and sang
What a joyous happy gang

♬♬ Oh we’re going back to Israel through the sea
Oh we’re going back to Israel through the sea
Oh we’re going back to Israel
Going back to Israel  ♬♬
We’re going back to Israel through the sea

Singing eye eye yippy yippy eye
Singing eye eye yippy yippy eye
Singing eye eye yippy, we’re off to Percy’s chippy
Eye eye yippy yippy eye                                              ♬

(c) John M Sterry 2020